The Art of Doing Nothing: Why We’re All Terrible At It

I’m Officially a Failure

Look, I’ll just say it: I’m bad at doing nothing. Really bad. I mean, I think I’m bad at it. Honestly, I’m not sure what ‘good’ at doing nothing even looks like. But here we are.

It started last Tuesday. I woke up at 6:30 AM—no alarm, no dog barking, just… silence. My wife, let’s call her Marcus, was already up, coffee brewing. She looked at me and said, “You’re not getting up, are you?” And I said, “I’m gonna try not to.” Which, frankly, should’ve been my first red flag.

Marcus is the kind of person who can sit on the couch and just… be. No phone, no book, no knitting. Just sitting. I, on the other hand, get up to pee, then check my email, then refill my water, then adjust the thermostat. It’s a problem.

Why Can’t I Just Sit Still?

I asked my friend Dave about this. Dave’s one of those people who can nap anywhere, anytime. “It’s a skill,” he told me over coffee at the place on 5th. “You gotta train yourself. Start small. Like, don’t check your phone for 10 minutes.” I tried that. Failed. Miserably.

I think the issue is that I’ve convinced myself that doing nothing is lazy. But is it really? I mean, look at the seasonal sale shopping guide tips. Those people are doing something, sure, but they’re also taking a break from the grind. Maybe doing nothing is just… recharging.

But here’s the thing: I’m not sure I believe that. I mean, I want to believe it, but my brain keeps screaming, “You’re wasting time!” Which, honestly, is completley unhelpful.

Science Says… Something

I did some research. Well, I Googled “benefits of doing nothing” for 214 seconds. And you know what? There’s actually some stuff out there. Like, doing nothing can reduce stress, improve creativity, and even help you live longer. Which, okay, sounds great. But how do I actually do it?

I tried meditating. Couldn’t do it. My mind wandered to my to-do list, my grocery list, my “I should probably call my mom” list. It was a disaster. Then I tried just sitting. That was worse. My body started itching, my legs got restless, and I ended up vacuuming the living room at 11:30 PM.

A Tangent: The Great Nap Debate

Speaking of doing nothing, let’s talk about naps. I love naps. But Marcus hates them. “You’re not a toddler,” she says. “You can’t just nap whenever you want.” But why not? I mean, look at the Spanish. They’ve got siestas down to a science. But here in the US, we’re like, “No, no, you gotta grind 24/7.” It’s ridiculous.

I asked Dave about naps. “I nap every day,” he said. “It’s the only way I can function.” Which, fair enough. But then he told me he also does yoga and drinks green juice. So maybe he’s just a health nut. I don’t know.

Back to the Grind

So, here’s the deal. I’m gonna try to do nothing more often. Maybe start with 5 minutes a day. No phone, no TV, no distractions. Just… sitting. And if I fail, well, at least I tried. And if I succeed, maybe I’ll finally understand what Marcus sees in it.

But for now, I’m gonna go check my email. You know, just in case.

About the Author: Jane Doe is a senior magazine editor with 20+ years of experience. She’s terrible at doing nothing but loves writing about it. When she’s not editing, she’s probably checking her email for the 17th time that hour.